Do I Trust Him to Lead?

The other day, Brad and Samuel and I were in the car, and of course, the gas tank was on ‘E’. (Why is the tank always on ‘E’?) So Brad pulled into the gas station in our neighborhood…no really, this gas station is in the middle of our neighborhood.

It’s the weirdest thing. I’ve never seen a little shopping plaza right in the middle of a neighborhood like this before, but there it is. A fantastic Italian joint, coffee shop, pizza place, martial arts dojo, dance studio, chiropractor, abandoned churchfront, eye doctor – and the gas station. All of it hidden in our little hood’s bubble. It’s great because the shops feel like ours, like you have to be in the club to even know they exist.

Anyway, we pull in – and the gas pumps are all occupied save one. Now, this is odd because the plaza is never busy. So, Brad circles around, and starts to back the car into the one lonely stall.

At this point, I realize that my neck is craned and scanning the back left of the car as if I were leading driving.

I stop and think to myself, Do I trust him?


Listen carefully: It’s not that I choose not to trust him, but I don’t choose TO trust him.

See the difference? It’s subtle, but important. Because in our marriage, I fight this

I would rather be in charge. Obviously, I would lead far better. I would make decision B rather than A and that would yield 2 more bushels of corn and 5 extra minutes in the morning. And I tell him so. “I would go with B because blablabla…”

I think I say, “I would do…” half the time I talk to my husband. And it ends today.

He doesn’t need me to lead him.

Now, don’t get me wrong. He needs to follow, alright. He needs to follow Christ.

And I need to follow him.

Be imitators of me, just as I also am of Christ, (NETBible, 1 Corinthians 11:1)

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9 thoughts on “Do I Trust Him to Lead?

  1. Shelely

    I love it! Thank you for sharing that. Working with your husband and the other guy gives me a great opportunity to learn to trust and discuss as one day I hope to be married, honoring my future husband in trusting him by following. So thanks!

  2. Karyn

    This is good stuff. It’s one thing to feel like you’re trusting him overall, but if it’s not happening in the little things (like driving a car), it can’t be happening overall. It’s tough for those of us who want to take the reigns! I like the car analogy because I’m a notorious backseat driver and I have to ask myself if I’m doing that to him in other areas of our relationship…

    Yet again, you’ve got me thinking!

  3. Crystal

    Stephanie – that was a word I needed to hear today! I do that so often with my husband as well (ESPECIALLY about driving)and I know it just makes him feel terrible. Great stuff to work on 🙂

  4. Kassie

    Just came across your blog! Thank you for this post! I need to choose to trust my husband! This is a struggle daily because I rather be in charge as well!

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